Tag Archives: marriage


Of Marriages and Divorces

Not too long ago, I found out that the country of my birth, the Philippines, is the remaining holdout (aside from the Vatican) to not have divorce laws in place. My parents, however, were divorced. They were married in the Philippines but had their marriage dissolved in the U.S. Getting divorced in another country is one of the very few recourse available to married Filipinos. Which in turn, perpetuates the ongoing myth in countries like the Philippines and elsewhere, that in the U.S., marriage is taken lightly and that most marriages end in divorce. A myth that is perpetuated by the media and celebrities, unfortunately.

The truth is, statistics show that the divorce myth in the U.S. is just that. A myth. The numbers show, according to this New York Times article that the divorce rate has slowed down over the past decade and that in fact, the institution of marriage is stronger than ever. I certainly see that among acquaintances. News of anyone getting a divorce has gotten rare that when you hear of one, it has become a shock.

The downturn of divorce rate is definitely a good thing, but as any married person can tell you, it is a reality and sometimes an inevitable conclusion to some marriages. Some marriages are just not meant to be and we have to realize and accept that. Personally, even as I have no plans or desire to end mine, I like having that option available. Everyone should be able to make their own choices.

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21 Years of US Being Imperfect

If WE were a person, we’d be of legal age by now. So join us in finally being able to toast togetherness legally šŸ™‚

To the man who has hang in there with me all these years, through all the good and the bad, the highs and the lows; he who always can make me smile no matter how surly I feel and who always managed to put up with me both at my best and at my worst, HAPPY ANNIVERSARY! I love you more every day. Your love has made me a better woman.

My Two Cents on Marriage and Ammendment One

I have a hard time understanding what happened, but if the word MARRIAGE isĀ problematic, then I do not have anyĀ issues with renaming it. Call it a partnership, call it a twosome, call it a merger….. whatever. Just giveĀ ALL families the same rights and privileges as ‘traditional’ families. Why is that so hard to do? It just seems sensible to me.

Why is it so difficult to get understanding and compassion from the same people who purport to be living by the word of God?

I’m not going into the argument of what God wants and what God meant because I don’t know it just like everyone else and anyone who professes to know is lying to you. But don’t take my word onĀ it.

It was a sad and shameful night in NC last night when Ammendment One to the state’s constitution was passed and catapulted NC among other states who have banned same-sex marriages. North Carolina’s state constitution now specifically defines a marriage to be only between one man and one woman.

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Love Gives Me Hope

It’s always the small events in life that matters the most and I have never felt that more to be true than the past week.

Last week, I received a disturbing message on facebook. Now I don’t usually entertain these type of messages and I’ve gotten pretty good at letting things roll off my back. But this one, it stung a bit because of the nature of it. I tried to laugh it off but it bugged me…

I wasn’t going to say anything about it, but my husband noticed that something was eating at me and so he asked what it is. So I told him.

Someone is jealous of me and claims that I am after her husband. This woman claims that I am flirting with her husband and wants to continue a relationship with him. She also claims that all my facebook updates are directed at her husband. That wouldn’t have been so bad in and of itself but she has also gone around to people who know me (are related to me) and told them her tale and plead with them to please talk some sense into me.

I told my husband the story, a little concerned that he may believe the rumors. You know what he said?
“I have a beautiful and intelligent wife!! It’s natural that they’d be jealous!”

Wasn’t that sweet? But that’s not all. He knows all this is going on around the things I post on facebook. So today, just a few minutes ago, actually, he comments on one of my posts and I just about cried! He never comments on my facebook! We would look at some of the things I post and discuss the more interesting comments at home, when we’re sitting next to each other. No need for us to comment on each other’s walls. But this time, I know he did it to show his support of what’s going on (he usually leaves me to do my thing on fb). I know he wants my fb stalkers to know he’s got my back no matter what they are claiming about me. See, my husband knows me better than anyone else. He knows such claims should be pitied.

So there! You gossipmongers, see if your husband who is supposed to be so wonderful that I would want to take him away from you, is as awesome than the one I have! I’d be insane to want anyone else!

There is a website called Love Gives Me Hope and I never thought I would ever have a story to post on a site like that but I think this story comes pretty darn close!

Today, my husband made me go “AWW” with something as simple as a comment on facebook. šŸ˜€

This post was entered into the It’s a Wife’s Life Blog Carnival. The next carnival will be in September. If you have a wifely story to share, make sure to submit it before Sept. 8 by using the submission form.

Did I Marry the Right Person?

From Wedding

I’m sure many married people have asked themselves this question. At one time I did too.

My answer was: YES, I did marry the perfect person for me. The man I married 19 years ago knew just what I needed when I needed it and how I needed it.

He has driven me to madness but he has also propelled me to happiness.

He made me want to be a better person than I was; although he would have been perfectly happy with the girl he married, he makes me want to be worthy of his love.

He makes me smile. Even at my worst, this man can make me smile. And during the lowest of low moments when nothing could bring forth a smile, he was there to cushion me until I could muster one.

After 19 years of togetherness is our marriage perfect? Of course not. Nobody’s is. We make love but we also make wars. And I’ve learned that it’s all good because it’s what happens in between the loves and wars that truly matters. It’s the mundaneness of living everyday with the same person that is important. It’s the day’s hellos and goodbyes, the good mornings and good nights that matter. It’s the mere words and acts that we take for granted. It’s those that when you make a conscious effort to inject love in the ordinary and actually mean it, they become extra ordinary.

When you say ‘HELLO’, for instance, say it as if you said ‘hello! I am truly happy to see you’. When you say ‘GOOD MORNING’ say it as if saying ‘I am glad to open my eyes and you’re the first thing I see. I am glad to start another day with you and I can’t wait until we are back in this moment again to say GOOD NIGHT.’

To the man who still can make me smile and can still make me feel beautiful as a girl but respects me as a woman and friend, HAPPY ANNIVERSARY. We don’t look the same as when we said I DO but neither would I say ‘I DO’ the same way. Today, if I were asked again to answer, I will say I DO more confidently and ardently because I know what is to come…and I do not regret one moment of what has come to pass.

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